Nice weekend...

I hope everyone had a great weekend.  We sure did.  I actually think it was the first full weekend that the girls and I spent at home in quite some time.  We had a good time.  Watching movies, playing, going to church, grocery shopping, laundry, cleaning out closets, etc.  Peighton's broken arm didn't slow her down at all.  They usually enjoy a sleepover at Nana's house each weekend or a trip to the lake w/ Papa Dan.  Unfortunately Nana's (Jan's) house was struck by lightening during a storm late last week, and she was busy trying to replace appliances and other damaged items to make her house livable again.  She still doesn't have gas, which means cold showers!

Belle doesn't seem to be doing quite as well.  Our poor kitten will probably have to go back to the vet in the morning to see if she may have some sort of infection following her procedures last week.  She seemed lethargic and sad today.  The girls did their best to cuddle with her and encourage her to get better.

One of my goals this week is to clean out the master bedroom closet.  I have put it off for long enough and will suck it up and start gathering and organizing Jen's clothes.  In December she told me that she wanted her mother and select friends to have her wardrobe (of very stylish clothes I might add) should something happen to her.  Last week I tackled the miscellaneous makeup drawer in our bathroom vanity and struggled through the entire 15 minutes.  For some reason, I can get through the emotional ups and downs of each day, but when it comes to physically touching her belongings I turn into a big baby.  I have heard strange stories over the years of people keeping bedrooms, closets, and various items exactly as their loved ones had left them long after their death.  Now I can almost understand why.  I'll leave enough around to make things not so lonely in my closet and bathroom.

As promised, below you'll find the list of Crawl for Cancer teams.  We did our best to put people with those they are familiar with, but remember that we will most likely travel in groups of 3 or 4 teams.  This means that we'll be more like huge teams of 30 or 40 rather than single teams of 10 or 12.  The registration process only required a team captain's name and the t-shirt sizes for the team.  This list is for our own purposes and can be rearranged and amended as necessary.  Please let me know if anyone is missing or if there are any other issues.  The asterisks by a name signifies that you sent a check or paid by Paypal.  Those without have made arrangements to pay in the near future or by another method.  In the coming weeks, I'll pass on the info about transportation and carpooling.  Everyone seems very excited for what should be a great day.

Click here for the Crawl for Cancer teams -----> Download Crawl4CancerRoster.pdf 

Comments

[Susan Bernhardt]

Chris,
I know going through your loved ones things is such a difficult process. I've been doing a little at at time since my mother died suddenly in November. Her purse is just as it was when she went in the hospital on October 26th. I know someone whose mother died 11 almost 12 years ago and the purse it still the same way it was when she died. Some things are easier to get rid of and others not so much. Don't push yourself too much or be hard on yourself. Do what you feel is necessary as you feel it. I cry like a baby everytime I find something of my mom's - a picture, a letter. She used to cut these pictures out of the KC Star and send to my girls - http://www.kansascity.com/multimedia/kansascity/archive/fyi/travel/2006_Star_Shooter_Final/index.html

They have kept them all and that makes me sad that they won't be getting them anymore. I try to carry on the traditions that she established but all the firsts are so hard. Her birthday was Friday and I didn't think I could get through the day but I did. It was very, very hard.

I hope your kitty gets better quick and wish I could be there for the "Crawl". Minnesota is just a little far away.

God Bless,
Susan

[Jennifer]

(((HUGS))) to you for all you have to deal with. I can't imagine how hard that must be for you. You are doing SO well!

I'm so sad to hear about Belle!!! Please let us know what the vet says.

~Jenn

[Alaina]

Even though I have not experienced anything close to what you have, take your time and don't push yourself. Do a little each day. Just like Susan said, some things are easier to get rid of than others. Don't second guess yourself when you wonder if you should keep it or not.

On a lighter note, I hope Belle starts feeling better. I bet the girls enjoy playing mommy to her.

Glad to hear Peighton is doing well with her cast. Maybe you could wrap Emma's in an ace bandage for a her 'cast' too.

Looks like you were successful in putting some teams together for the crawl. The list is amazing!

[Jessica Stevenson]

Chris
Just wanted to let you know that you and your family are still in my thoughts. I check your blog every day to see what is new. As far as cleaning out Jennifers things it is a very hard step because it makes it more of a reality that she is not there. I know from experience with my dad how that feels. Keep doing what your doing and with time things will be better

[Dawn]

WOW! The list for the crawl is amazing - I thought I'd never get to the end! That is such an honour and a testament to you and Jen and your families. Hope Belle gets well - I'm sure she will back to her precious self soon. Take your time with Jen's belongings - I know as others have said and through doing the same for my precious Nan that it is such a hard thing to do as every item has a story and a memory. You are doing a great job and just need to take every day as it comes... thinking of you every day, Dawn and Glyn x

[Desiree]

Remember to keep a few of the clothing items and make up things just for the girls. When they go through the stage of makeup and clothing they will appreciate what their mom left behind even more.. Hope this helps!!

[Sasha]

Still praying, still keeping you and your little ones in my thoughts. I know tons of swimmers that would love to come and visit with you Chris.

Sasha

[Christina]

Don't be so hard on yourself about parting with Jen's things. There are no rules when it comes to these things. There is no reason why you have to part with the things so soon. My mother kept one drawer of my father's clothes just as he left it for 22 years after he passed away. Now I have the contents of his drawer in a nice box in my closet. I was only 12 when he passed away and now that I am an adult I am really glad I have something of his. It makes me feel closer to him. I think your girls would like it if you keep something for them when they are grown.

I'm still keeping you and your whole family in my daily thoughts and prayers. God Bless

[amy copple]

What an amazing list-- I can't wait for tha crawl! It was a beautiful day out at the K today for the home opener, saw alot of familiar faces. I hope the Belle gets to feeling better. As Christina said, there are no rules when it comes to parting with Jen's things- take your time. Thinking and praying for you and the girls each and every day.
xoxo- amy copple

[Angela]

Hi Chris,

This is my first posting but I've been following your site for awhile now, and think that you exhibit tremendous strength. Your wife was so beautiful - and your girls are the splitting image of Jen. May God hold you all close as you find your way through the coming months on this new journey. I will continue to follow your story for as long as you choose to share it. I will NOT forget Jen, or the strength & courage she showed, either.

[Tressy]

Chris~
You are still in my thoughts and prayers every day. I keep up with the blog and want you to know not to feel like you have to rush on clearing things out and putting things away. One of my dearest friends just told me today that her mother has been gone 15 years now and still has some of her mom's things packed in boxes. There are things she just can not part with or still can not bring herself to part with. Then this evening I read your post and you were talking about the same thing.Take your time it will all work out in due time. Just think of something happy and memorable about each thing you put away or keep. I think it is wonderful that Jen knew where she wanted her wonderful clothes to go. Jan and Jen's special friends will feel like they have Jen closer than ever. I can only imagine what you are going through, just know that there are still people everyday who think about you and the girls and your family.

[Brianna Barr]

Hey Chris! I just wanted to tell you that I am thinking about you and your girls...and Belle, too, of course! I can't imagine how hard it is to go through Jen's things. My prayers are with you.

On a happy note, I am quite excited for the Crawl for Cancer. It looks like you have a great big group attending...should be good times!! I'll be there in a different group, so hopefully I will run into you guys!!!

Lots of hugs,
Brianna

["Little Angels" Mom]

Hi Chris, What you said about Jen's belongings is so true ... my dad passed away almost 2 years ago, and although my mom has given most of his things to family members, his slippers and robe still hang in their closet. And actually, it's comforting to me to that it's still there! You're doing a great job w/those girls, Emma is in my son's class and she is SUCH a doll!! Have a good week!

[Jill Peltier]

Hi Chris,
I just spent the last three days reading your entire blog! What a story and what a ride. I have had a close relationship with cancer all my life! I had cancer when I was three (I am now the same age as Jennifer). My father had cancer in 2001 and still battles with the after effects of treatment to this day. I am also a nurse and work on an inpatient hematology/oncology unit in KC. I also am the full time care giver to my father and almost lost him in the last month. The one thing that scared me in that whole process was having to go through his things and decide what to do with all of them! It makes me cry just thinking about the task you have ahead of you and you will be in my prayers. Not to mention all the tears I have on the sleeve of my shirt from reading your entire blog! You and Jennifer are such an inspiration to anyone you touch! Reading your blog I have felt many of the same emotions and experienced similar situations while caring for my father. Not to mention the patients I care for as nurse in the same area. Thank you for sharing your experience. Your girls are beautiful and are a reflection of their mother and father's love! I will keep your whole family in my prayers!
Jill